Embracing the discomfort of our repressed desires

Avoiding simplicity and embracing nuance

Many astrologers and astro-enthusiasts have a tendency to regurgitate very simplistic interpretations of the planets, signs, and transits. My teacher refers to this as the doom and gloom astrologer. It’s an easy path to take — basic knowledge is acquired and then prescribed to others in statements such as you’ll break up with your boyfriend soon or a large sum of money is about to come into your life.

For example, if we repeatedly hear Scorpios are intense and manipulative, we begin to absorb that limited viewpoint into our psyches. This affects our unconscious biases and can manifest by expressing shallow judgements of others or ourselves.

Instead, we need to be seeking nuance and alternative viewpoints so that we can avoid a black and white perspective of the world. Scorpios might have an intense quality to them, but why? What is the underlying goal of that energy? A Scorpio seeks transformation by merging with something greater than themselves. When we look at it in this way — the why behind the intensity — we can begin to unfurl the rich evolutionary goals of the sign and apply them to our understanding. This expansion of perspective helps us live more creatively and compassionately.

Saturn: The bridge between conscious and unconscious

I think about this a lot when it comes to Saturn, the planet often associated with authority, discipline, and hard lessons. Throughout history, it’s been called a malefic and has been seen as the bringer of strife, misery, and suffering. You’ve most likely heard of the Saturn return, a period of time in our late 20s and late 50s in which we’re asked to level up by working through challenging circumstances. Yes, Saturn brings difficulties, but why?

I like to look at Saturn’s energy as the place in which the conscious and unconscious go to duke it out. As we age, we become conditioned by our environments and experiences and this conditioning leads us to form our egos and identity structures. However, this is only one side of the equation — the conscious aspect of our reality. The other side contains our unconscious motivations which often go unnoticed until we make space for them to rise up. Saturn happens when these unconscious motivations meet reality. The inner voice that starts out as a whisper eventually becomes something we can’t ignore until it’s consciously integrated. If we don’t intentionally introduce these things into reality, something else will: a divorce, illness, an accident, etc. To level up, we have to invoke change through free will so we have control over our lives, otherwise life will control us. That’s the essence of Saturn.

Once the conscious and unconscious begin their dance, we tend to feel friction, restriction, and discomfort. This is where many people stop in their tracks and give up. Fear arises and then takes control. This is why many of us live our lives from a place of fear and avoid that inner voice that’s trying to get us to upgrade our reality. Fear has us believing that if we live out our inner desires, the people that contributed to our conditioning will reject us, leaving us alone and unsafe. This is a basic survival instinct at play. But our ability to move beyond this threshold is what separates us from mere animals. We can look beyond our fear response, kindly tell it thank you for your opinion, and then set it aside and move on. Once we do that, we can accept change into our lives with more ease.

The silver lining is that Saturn wants us to realize our potential so that we can live without regrets. It wants us to find fulfillment in our daily lives and achieve a lasting sense of happiness, however its methods are just slightly masochistic. If the structure of our life isn’t bringing us fulfillment, Saturn will start breaking that structure down until it’s dealt with. This is the nuanced perspective I like to look at this traditionally malefic planet from. Does it simply bring us pain for the sake of torture alone, or is pain just the byproduct of integrating something new into the system?

A moment to reflect

I’ve been experiencing this friction when it comes to integrating astrology into what I project out into the world. At times, I will get overwhelming feelings of inadequacy and fear of not being taken seriously. Oh look, Ry has gone all woo-woo. He should just stick to what he’s good at. These beliefs aren’t mine, but through my own external conditioning I’ve made the mistake of making space for them. Conscious attention on the fear only makes it stronger. Conscious attention on the thing that is feared brings transformation into a more whole version of one’s self. Saturn is about limits and pushing beyond them. That’s why Saturn transits, like our Saturn returns, can be hard to experience.

Where has this shown up for you?

If you’re reading this far and choose to reflect on this throughout the week ahead, it might bring up some intense feelings. However, this isn’t about regretting all that you haven’t accomplished throughout your life. It’s about noticing the unanswered calls from within and treating the fear holding you back with a little more kindness.

• What are some of your hidden desires and motivations?

• Have you spent any time exploring them?

• What innate fears keep you from realizing their potential?

• Have you experienced an event outside of your control that forced you to make space for something or change your life direction?

• What support do you need to bring your dreams into reality?

I’d love to know how this resonates with you. If you feel inclined, please hit reply and share your thoughts, experiences, or questions.

Take care and see you next Sunday,
~Ry